GET THROUGH THE HOLIDAYS WITH SOME FRM (Family Relationship Marketing) TIPS

 

1.The “Constructive” Criticizer

Attitude- “When I was in your situation, I knew exactly what I had to do.” Challenge – Gives you unsolicited advice about everything from raising your kids to raising your hemline.  Key message – “Don’t worry about me—I’m fine!

2.The Slacker

Attitude – “Yup, just a sec…I’ll be riiiight in.” Challenge – Refuses to help with the cooking, cleaning, child care, or even candle-lighting. Key message – “It would be a great help if you went ahead and started rinsing the dishes. Let me get you an apron.”

3.The Cheerleader

Attitude – “Hey, guys! Let’s bundle up and go caroling in the snow!” Challenge – Hurls herself into the holiday spirit, donning seasonal sweaters with more doodads than a junk drawer. If you’re not in the mood or if her joyousness feels forced, the cheerleader can be extremely irritating. Key message – Don’t  let her cow you into wearing felt antlers to the table, either. Just keep your distance.

4.The Exaggerator

Attitude –  “The Feds said the raid could not have gone down without my tip.” Challenge – Oversells achievements, work situations, children’s accomplishments, size of fish caught. Key message – This is the result of insecurity. Let him have his moment

5. The Martyr

Attitude – Often heard saying: Nothing. She’s still in the kitchen, slaving away over a hot stove. Challenge – Lets everyone know just how many potatoes she had to peel—and shows the blisters to prove it. Key message – All you can do is ask if she needs help. She is obviously getting something she needs out of this, be it satisfaction or superiority.

6. The Passive-Aggressor

Attitude – “Whatever you think is best.” Challenge- Follows every shred of opinion with a question mark. Knows what she wants but tells you after the fact. This person is wounded because you haven’t been able to read her mind. Her behavior is a subtle manipulative device that she is probably totally unaware of. Key message – Ask her to be clear the next time.

7. The Whiner

Attitude- “Help! My string beans are touching the gravy!” Challenge –  Makes it known that nothing is right—or as good as it was in December 1984. Complains about everything from the fork tines to the figgy pudding.  Key message – Most malcontents are not a threat and don’t require you to do anything but continue being your usual friendly and polite self.

8. The Busybody

Attitude – “Got a bun in the oven yet?” Challenge- Annually asks when you are going to get a man, get married, get pregnant, or get a life. The busybody wants to feel superior to you by making you feel insecure. Key message- In response to her nosy inquiries, ask politely why she is asking—and smile.

9. The Emotional Wreck

Attitude- “I just need closure.” Challenge- Goes to pieces whenever the family comes together. Give this person a chance to vent before you all sit down to supper. Key message – Assure him that you know he is going through a difficult time, and say that you want to hear all about it.

10. The Drunk Uncle

Attitude- “Less mixer, more liquor.” Challenge- Makes it tempting to switch to sparkling cider for the sake of a peaceful dinner. Key message- Communicate ahead of time that drinking will be limited this year.  Ask specifically for this person’s cooperation.

Source: How to Avoid Holiday Family Fights, www.realmple.com